New Barfing Record

Today we installed a new car seat for Matthew. His first car seat held up to 25 pounds and he has maxed it out. Plus, Matthew was so uncomfortable in it and I was tired of cramming chubby arms and legs through straps that were just too small. He couldn't fit in it if he was wearing a sweater or jacket. We would have to strip him down to the base coat of clothing to make the buckle click.

That being said- it was time for a bigger boy seat! Damien installed it this morning before church. We strapped Matthew in, drove the five minutes to church and as we were pulling into a parking spot at mass, we heard a noise that was unmistakable. It could have only been one thing. We didn't need to turn around to know that Matthew threw up all over himself and the brand new car seat. Car seats by nature are just nasty. The baby spits up (it dries), drops food, leaks through it's diaper, has dirty shoes, has dirty clothes, and over time- car seats become a petri dish of sorts. Collecting everything from everywhere! You can only imagine how happy we were to retire the first car seat. To start fresh- start anew. But here we are, five minutes into this fresh feeling and before we can enjoy it, it was over.

We stripped Matthew down to his onesie and pants, wrapped a blanket around him and walked into church feeling dejected. Matthew has the new barfing record for the Swendsen household. What record will he want to break next?

SCU Alumni Day

To think that exactly one year ago today, I was lugging Michael and Claire to the SCU Alumni Event is wild. I was just 10 days postpartum with Matthew and left him for the first time with Damien to bring Michael and Claire out of the house and to the SCU Women's Basketball game. I hadn't seen some of the people for a long time and a lot of the old fans were a delight to see. The thing that was a bummer was that I still looked pregnant. Hello! 10 days postpartum! At first it was embarrassing when people told me, "Oh, you have another Swendsen on the way!" I quickly found a way to dodge the bullet while also minimizing the embarrassment they would feel once they realized I wasn't pregnant! I just said, "Nope. Just deflating."

This year I was NOT pregnant and thrilled to bring Matthew along, too. The kids love that during halftime they get to walk out of the floor while everyone in the gym claps. I try and think of what it must feel like for them to walk out on such an 'intimidating stage'. They are so little and the stadium is so big. I hope that this memory and the memories to come stay with them. I know that it feels great to be able to give them an opportunity to experience a little of my past and for them to walk on the same floor that I spent hundreds upon hundreds of hours perfecting a game that I love.

We had a great turn out this year. We had a few former players from many years ago and an increase in more recent former players. It was good to catch up with everyone and to see what they are doing now that they are a little more removed from the hardwood. Most everyone had children, one graduate was getting ready to get married, and it was interesting to chat with the current players and get a glimpse of what they are going through, too. It's funny. I am so content in my life. I try and have a good balance of taking care of the kids, of Damien, but also finding time to take care of myself, too. Yet as I sat on the bleachers watching the girls play, my adrenaline started pumping and I would've loved nothing more than to have thrown on a uniform and jumped in the game. I truly loved playing at Santa Clara. My experiences there stripped me down to my innermost core and allowed me to rebuild myself they way I wanted. Some of the most difficult times of my life were on that floor. Other times, it was pure bliss. I will never forget winning my last game in Toso Pavillion. Standing in the center circle, surrounded by my teammates, fans cheering, a real surge of energy floating through the air. It was this moment, WCC trophy in hand, basketball net around my neck, that I truly felt like I was floating on air. I was so happy.

Right now as I type this, Matthew is pulling on my leg. There is a stack of paperwork on the counter I have to get to, dishes in the sink, and only 10 more minutes until I need to pick up Michael from school. I love my life but also love that I can take a deep breath, close my eyes and feel victory pumping through my veins as I stand in the center circle. I have turned in my #15 jersey and hung up my shoes from those days, but in a split second I am there again. No matter what is going on in my life or where I am- this memory alone sets me afloat.

Valentine's Day

Having spent the night away from the kids this past weekend, we kind of decided that we would keep our Valentine's Day low key. It was a beautiful day here and the sun peeking through the windows kept my mood light and my spirits bright. Both of the big kids had school so our morning started early!

When I was a child, I could hardly wait for Valentine's Day morning! Every year, my Dad would get all five of us girls a heart shaped box full of chocolate. I counted on that treat. Sure, my Mom always had a really cute bag full of goodies waiting for us on the kitchen counter- but there was something about that box of chocolates that had me looking forward to Valentine's Day all year long. When the kids were small, I told Damien that I thought it would be cute if he started this tradition, too. Done deal. (Thanks Dad for the idea!)

Up bright and early, I got the kids all dressed up in red. Michael was especially excited because it was a 'free dress' day at his school if you wore Valentine colors. You would understand his excitement if you went to Catholic School or a school where you had to wear a uniform. Free dress days were the best! Both the kids came home from school with a bag full of loot and serious sugar highs. The day was pretty casual but we were all looking forward to dinner that night (which was arranged by Damien). We all hopped in the car and wondered where we were going! He cautioned me that he had not orchestrated some great plan, but instead picked a place that was kid friendly but also reminiscent of a past Valentine's Day.

He pulled the car to a stop on Lincoln Avenue to a really nice Chinese restaurant. I had to laugh. I knew what he was doing. See, about three years ago, we had a rough Valentine's Day. A few days prior to it, we found out that there were some fraudulent charges on our credit card. The bank closed the account and we were waiting to get the new cards in the mail. We had also just made a major purchase and were waiting for a larger check from Damien's work. Added all together, we had limited funds. When I say limited, I mean limited. That Valentine's night, with no debit/credit cards, we gathered $15 in quarters and headed to our favorite fast food Chinese, Wok n' Roll. Laugh if you want- but we learned a wonderful lesson that night. With Michael and Claire in tow, we all sat and ate dinner together and realized that the greatest gift was the gift of our little family. As Valentine's Day is all about love, we looked at Michael and Claire and realized that if were not for the love Damien and I had for each other, they wouldn't be here. They are the real product of our love and the reason our hearts were bursting with happiness. So on this Valentine's Day as we got out of the car for dinner, Damien told me that although the Valentine's Day three years ago helped us to realize love's true meaning, he felt this year I deserved to be treated to a really nice Chinese Dinner instead of fast food Wok n' Roll. I thought it was really cute and appreciated the sentiment.

We had a great dinner and just sat around and talked about life. We finished up eating, came home, and put the kids to sleep. Thankfully, they all slept soundly and let Damien and I just hang out and enjoy each other. It was a wonderful day and a great time to sit back and reflect on all of the blessings in my life.

Golden Circle

You can only imagine what a pleasant surprise it was to be invited by a dear friend of mine to a black tie formal. Coming from the day to day cracker smeared on my shirt, predictable velour sweat suit, and running shoes- it was a very welcome break from my ultra casual lifestyle. The event was Santa Clara University's Golden Circle, which this year featured entertainment by Kenny Loggins followed by a formal dinner and dancing at the Fairmont Hotel. I could hardly contain my excitement! A night away with Damien for us to act like adults, to be able to eat my dinner at my own pace and not worry about picking Matthew's throwaways up off the floor, not having to coax Michael into finishing his dinner . . . SIGN ME UP!

Back in the day before my primary job was staying home with the kids, I worked at Santa Clara University for just over two years. Having attended Santa Clara for my undergraduate education, I LOVED working there and naturally had an exuberant amount of pride and passion for what I did. Working as an Event Planner, I worked on two Golden Circle events as well as other events and really enjoyed what I did. Perhaps one day, once the kids are in school, I can return to this field since I really feel like it is my other passion (aside from running carpools, changing diapers and feeding babies bottles in the middle of the night).

Damien's parents came down to watch the kids and I was really excited to get out for the night! Let's see. A formal dress- check. Hubby looking handsome in a tuxedo- check. Dinner and dancing- check. A night of un-interrupted sleep- triple check! We kissed the kids goodbye and off we went! We decided to stay at the hotel for the night and just live it up! Kenny Loggins was great and we realized that we knew more of his songs that we had originally thought! Dinner was fabulous and the decor was amazing. Every year at this event, around two thousand people attend. Each different dining room at the hotel looks as if it's its own world. Different colors, lighting, draping, flowers, and bands give each room it's own unique feel and it is fun to visit each room and dance to different music and enjoy the ambiance.

One wonderful thing about Santa Clara is that it is one giant family. We saw SO many people we knew and had so many wonderful conversations with people we haven't seen for a while! This event is a homecoming of sorts for all those who love SCU and want a chance to get together and dance the night away. I was so thankful that Karrie invited us to Golden Circle and feel blessed that she would treat us to such an amazing night.

When we came home the next afternoon, refreshed from some time away and after having some serious R&R- we were so happy to see the kids and thankful that for a brief evening, Damien and I got to reconnect and spend some much needed alone time together. It is hard to get away and leave the kids, but we both came back refreshed, renewed, and ready to resume our responsibilities at home. Thanks to Mark and Marlene for giving us a chance to get away!

Twinkle Toes

For months now, Claire has been begging us to be enrolled in ballet/tap class. I kept saying, "Okay, I will look for a class for you", but somehow, it just didn't happen. In the meantime, Michael has been playing on a basketball team, I just signed them both up for Spring Soccer, but still- no ballet class. So I told myself that I was going to sit down at the computer and not get up until I found a class for my little Clairey. Thankfully, it didn't take long to find an affordable and local class for her. It would meet once a week for an hour and I thought that it would fit well into our schedule.

When I told her that she was going to start ballet, she went crazy! She called my parents, my sisters- anyone who would want to hear the great news! I took her out shopping to get the necessary shoes and then to another store to pick out her leotard. Watching the happiness ooze from Claire, I felt guilty that I put this off for so long. However, I had to cut myself a break and just find some peace in the fact that I finally had enrolled her and move on!

Long long ago, I took several years of tap/ballet. I remember loving it. The practices, the big shows, traveling to competitions, the music, the outfits . . . it was all great. I did this for several years until my Dad saw it fit to transition me from dance to more physical sports. The rest is history. Being the oldest of five girls, I now realize that this must have been a financial strain to keep me (and my sister Jill) in dance for so many years. For one, back then they didn't carry tap/ballet shoes at Payless. When I told my Mom that I had purchased shoes for Claire, her response was, "I hope you bought them used!" What she didn't realize was that instead of the very expensive shoes that were really your only option back in the day, you can now buy ballet or tap shoes at Payless for $15-20 a pair! Funny how things change over the years!

On Claire's first day of ballet, she couldn't sit still. She was in her leotard HOURS before her class. She was leaping off furniture and dancing to music. To see the joy this opportunity gave her was wonderful. What I didn't realize was how much joy this gave to me, as well. Claire looked beautiful in her outfit. Normally, when people see Claire, they comment about how big Claire is. When I see her gallop around the house, I always think that it must be so hard to have such long legs and arms that you just can't completely control. Claire has always been wiggly- the kind of child that will be sitting in a chair and then suddenly fall on the floor without realizing how it happened. With all of the rapid growing she does, I often think how hard it would be to try and be coordinated. Yet when Claire pranced around the house, she was graceful. Long beautiful arms flying through the air. Her legs in sweet unison with the top of her body. Her long neck stretching to the sky as she pirouetted through the living room. I had to stop myself from tearing up. She looked so beautiful and I took the opportunity to enjoy her in all her splendor.

Her first class went great! I got to see her go in and warm up but then had to leave as they don't allow the parents to stay and watch. The parents and siblings will get to attend their final performance on the last day of class. As I drove away from the facility with Michael and Matthew, I knew that Claire was where she wanted to be. In a room where she could be with other girls, wear pink, dance around and have fun. Yes, it took me a while to sign her up and get organized but it was a small victory to know that in the end- she got her wish.

And The Parties Keep Coming!

So as most of you know, we Swendsens love a good party! So why not have another one? That's just what we did! After celebrating Matthew's birthday down here, we traveled up to my parent's house to celebrate with the other half of the family. We traveled on Matthew's actual birthday and landed just in time to have a wonderfully relaxing and festive birthday dinner. My mom, who is amazing (I swear!) made piadines for dinner. Maybe you don't know what they are, but when I just hear the word, I start salivating. A piadine is a salad that is served on top of a warm pizza crust. You fold the round pizza crust in half and then eat it like a sandwich. There is a restaurant down here called Tomatina and their Chicken Piadine is seriously- one of my favorite foods in the entire world! So can you imagine my surprise when I got off the plane, lugged our stuff into the house, and realized what my Mom had prepared! They were AMAZING!!! Grazie!!! After dinner, Jill and my Mom had made some birthday cupcakes for us all to enjoy. Matthew loved it and picked at it for a very long time (which gave me a huge break to just relax). Again, he balked at blowing out the candle but he still gets and E for effort.

I was excited to have Matthew's party at my parent's because this was the inaugural birthday party in their newly remodeled house. Up until this point, we have had the parties at Jill's house because their house was still in the throws of construction. My mom was as excited as I was and actually pre-made the entree for the party before I came up there. This really freed up our time to just enjoy each other and kind of put the party on the back burner for a few days. We hung around the house for a good part of the first few days and just relaxed. Matthew and his cuz, Kyle, crawled after each other and it was impressive because this was the first time that they didn't hit and understood 'nicey'. They are so close in age (just over 3 months) and really notice when one or the other is not getting attention or if the other one has the 'cool toy' of the moment. Anyway- it is just fun to watch them together. Every time Matthew is around Kyle, he learns something new. This trip, Kyle taught Matthew how to give hugs. I would like to personally thank Kyle for this because now I am the lucky recipient of Matthew's newly learned affection!

While we were up there, I was able to play in a soccer game with Jill and Gina. This is always so fun for me because it is like we have this unspoken language on the field. We watch each other's backs and make sure that no one is being too rough with one of us. We never let the other team know we are sisters and use if to our advantage like a secret little alliance. I really enjoy seeing Jill mow over someone or Gina juke someone and put a perfectly placed ball down the line. The co-ed team we played for unfortunately had a few of the typical 'I Don't Pass to Girls' guys so that made it challenging and frustrating, too. That was another reason playing with them was so fun because if I made a run and was open in the box, Jill and Gina would make every effort to get it there. We won the game despite the fact that it was absolutely freezing. But what I take away the most was a fun night with my sissies and a chance to get away from the kids and have a ball!

The party went off without a hitch. It was so nice to prepare all the food in the new kitchen and to have so much space to move around. People had a good time, milled around, the kids all played together, the food was good, and the chance to catch up with everyone was awesome. Matthew seemed to finally get a little more of the concept that this was his party. We had a darling Curious George piñata (which the two little boys loved), a super cute animal cake, and Matthew got so many wonderful and thoughtful gifts. Matthew again thoroughly enjoyed the cake and we had to let him go at it again just for the thrill of seeing him get filthy! It was a great party and a fantastic way to bid adieu to his first birthday celebrations.

The next day my parents had the BEST Superbowl party! We had just enough time to take down the birthday decorations and get the Superbowl decorations out before people started arriving. Everyone brought some kind of food (I totally overate!) and started buying squares in the Superbowl Score Grid. They had the game on in the theater and in two other locations so everyone got a chance to see the game. People went crazy with the Superbowl grid and were wildly rooting for a chance to have their numbers we the score at the end of the quarter. The prizes were $25 for the first quarter score, $50 for halftime score, $25 for the third quarter score, and $100 for the final score. Being the brainiac that I am, I scheduled our flight for the middle of the Superbowl. Damien was pretty cool about it. When I booked the flights a while back, I was surprised to see the return flight be so cheap! So naturally, I swiped them up with pleasure- that was until I realized WHY they were so cheap. Lucky for us, our flight was delayed which meant that we got to watch the thrilling end to the game in the airport and scream with the other people who probably didn't realized they booked their flight in the middle of the Superbowl, either. It was one of the best games I have ever seen and nothing was better than getting a call from my Dad saying that I won the $100 grand prize! I guess flying during the Superbowl wasn't bad after all!

Matthew's 1st Birthday Party

Matthew, Matthew, Matthew. What a kid. It was a lot of fun experiencing his first year because we all approached it in such a laid back manor. Not a lot of stress, fuss, or anxiety. Sure there was some sleep deprivation and some craziness- but mostly, we all just enjoyed the ride! It was a lot of fun thinking of his first birthday party! What would we do differently from Michael and Claire's first birthday? What can we have at the party that Matthew just adores? But the real question was would he blow out the candle and inhale the cake? Let the party begin!!!

As if having a party doesn't bring enough planning and stress, we of course had construction going on here. We told them that everything had to be done by Saturday at 1:00 p.m. and I swear to you, they put on the finishing touches and left at 12:30 p.m. Their work was outstanding and it felt good to know that things were finished here and ready to go when our guests arrived. Lucky for me, my sister-in-law Heather came over bright and early to help me clean up the house and get things organized. She is always there for me on days like this and I really, really appreciated it! I had prepped most all the food the day before and was excited to cook that day because I was trying some new recipes out! I usually cook a lot of Italian food, but I decided to take the Mexican food route and made some Green Salsa Enchiladas, Spanish Rice, a Citrus Red Leaf Lettuce Salad with Poppyseed dressing, and some Corn Bread with Honey Butter. My Mom has given me a few of the recipes and I totally trust her judgment on whether things are good or not. Heather, Marlene, and I got all the food ready and out for the guests and people really thought the change was good. So I will add these recipes to my usually predicable dinner routine.


People started rolling in and before we knew it, the party was in full swing. It was a great group of people but I must admit, I was a bit thrown off by the flow in the new house. I am not sure how many parties I had in the old house but when we did have a party, it ran like clockwork. Having a party in the new house made us re-evaluate where to put everything and made us think through so much more. It was fun showing everyone the new house and the new construction and what I loved the most was seeing all the kids in the backyard running around! We only had a patio in the old house and now that we have a yard, it opens up the possibility to so much more!


Matthew (and my other two kids) we thrilled with all the guests milling about and Matthew loved the balloons and decorations. He especially loved the pinata and even played with it after all the kids had kind of destroyed it. As any one year old would be, Matthew was oblivious to gift opening, but I sure was thankful for all of those who made the effort to celebrate with us and who were so loving to Matthew. It was no surprise to us that Matthew went to town on the cake. I know that I could've pulled the cake away after a minute of eating, but really- you are only one once and why not let the baby enjoy themselves? Thankfully, my dear friend Karen helped me give him a quick bath because he was covered in frosting!!!


It was a wonderful day, a wonderful party, and a wonderful chance to gather with family and friends and celebrate all that the previous year had brought us. Matthew is a gift and for me, he was the biggest and best present of them all.

Matthew Is ONE!!!!

Ahhhhhhh! It is here! Matthew has made it one full year! 365 days, 1000+ diaper changes, 100's of rides in the car, so many giggles, so many crying fits, new beginnings, new milestones, and he just keeps going. When will this boy stop! Hopefully, never. We love Matthew so much. I know I say that here a lot, but I have no other way of describing what this boy does to me. He makes my heart want to burst, he reminds me daily of what life is really about, he makes each and every one of us more blessed by his presence. He blurts our during dinnertime prayer, he knocks over and destroys Michael's very strategically built legos, he pulls himself up on Claire's princess vanity and knocks each purposefully placed princess figurine onto the floor. He pulls out of drawers things I just put back in. He pulls things down from Damien's work desk. Matthew gets into everything! You can look at this as something of a nuisance or you can choose to see that Matthew just wants to do what we do and be a part of our world. The temporary inconveniences he causes remind us that these little disturbances are just temporary and are not permanent. He reminds us to laugh it off, not worry so much about the little things. To enjoy life, to not sweat the small stuff, and to cherish each and every second we have together. Life is a gift and Matthew is going to get his hands on every little thing if we let him get into it or not. And the lesson we should learn from this . . . It's Okay.


Some people think that the first birthday is as much for the mother as it is for the baby. I know that for me personally, my baby's first birthday catapults me back to the delivery room when I first heard their first cry and laid eyes on them for the first time. I also like to give myself a little pat on the back that I made it a year! A Year!!!! More than anything in the world, I love having babies but it is a very hard job. That first year is tiring, stressful, and taxing. Countered with all of the positives a new baby brings, the hard parts pale in comparison. But at the end of the day- it is a huge milestone for the Mom to get through a year. I hate saying goodbye to the first year, but with Matthew, I seriously can say that I have lived, breathed, and enjoyed every single moment of his life. I made a real choice to not get frustrated in the middle of the night. I tried not to get mad at him for crying in the car or crying for no reason. More than any of my other babies, Matthew has had to find a way to fit in as the third child. He has no real schedule like my other kids did. If I have an hour window between pick up times, I have to get him to nap then. Or, sorry Matthew- you'll have to nap on the go! It is just what happens when you have older siblings with schedules. There is no way around it and so Matthew has learned to cope, and cope well.

So let's get to the stats. At one year, Matthew weighs 26 lbs. 4 oz. Can you believe that he is bigger than Claire was? That blows me away! The thing about Matthew's size is this. He is not a chubby chubby one year old. He is just thick. Stocky through the waist, chest, and legs. I guess my Nana said it right when she said he was 'Barrel Chested'. When people pick him up, they are shocked by how heavy he is. He looks big but you would never guess that he has all that girth unless you pick him up. So that is that. Big Big Boy!!! Height-wise, he is 32 inches tall. He is actually taller than he is heavy which again, is a surprise to me.

Eating wise he is no longer breastfeeding and fully on bottles of cows milk. He drinks 6 oz. of milk every 3 hours and really took well to the bottle when I weaned him. I was worried about this but he still finds great comfort by holding the bottle and snuggling into me (which I love). His meals now mostly consist of whatever we are eating at the moment. He eats the dinner we eat, he loves yougurt, string cheese, slices of turkey, bananas, apples, applesauce, all fruits . . . Really, Matthew eats everything and he does this with only 4 teeth! Just like Claire, he only has 4 and I don't see any trying to come through his gums at the moment. He finds a way to eat anything you put in front of him and as a Mother of three, I am so happy that he isn't a picky eater. I think I would pull my hair out!

Physically, Matthew is really moving quickly these days. He is an efficient crawler and has picked up a lot of speed. He pulls up to a stand on anything he can get his little hands on, and has been letting go and standing independently (unbeknownst to him) for several seconds at a time. He cruises around on furniture, goes down stairs, tries to put his fingers into every electrical outlet in the house, and picks up the tiniest of things on the floor! When Michael and Claire were babies, baby-proofing the house was no big deal. But since Michael is in love with legos (the little ones) and Claire has a tendency to hoard all things small (jewels, sequins, beads, etc.), I have to be on my toes. It cracks me up because let's say I leave Matthew alone in the family room and he is playing with a bunch of toys. When I walk by, I say "Matthew, what are you playing with?" and without turning around to see me, he just holds up whatever is in his hands. He also will spit things out if he sees me or if I say "What is in your mouth?" or "Stick out your tongue!" he will totally respond. I have to be more strict with him because I don't have the time I had with the other two to constantly watch after him and watch his every move. Again, third child syndrome, but I assure you he is a pretty lucky third child!

Matthew continues to be a cuddler and I LOVE IT!!!!! He knows how to give kisses and if you ask him to give you 'a love' (which he learned from his cousin, Kyle) he will lean over to you, put his head on your shoulder and give you a hug. It is so precious. He continues to have a really calm demeanor but as he is getting a little more frustrated with not being able to communicate or move to where he wants to go, I see the spunkiness in him coming out. He continues to love being held (what baby doesn't) and is totally enjoying his siblings. He squeals with delight when we pick them up from school or when they play peek-a-boo games with him. It is so fun to watch the three of them together. This month, more than every before, the three of them have been playing together. They have taken a few baths together (which is no easy feat) and Michael and Claire think it is so cool that Matthew thinks they are funny.

So, that's it. Our little guy is one. I still can't believe it and when I feel a little sad about it, I just remember to rejoice in the many many joyous moments my son has brought me. From the moment I knew I was pregnant, from the first time I heard his heartbeat, from the time I felt his first unmistakable movement in my tummy, to the euphoric moment when I first laid eyes on him- this baby has been a part of my heart. Matthew, we've had so many amazing times together. When you were born and had to stay in the NICU for your very first days, I ached to bring you home. I felt so bonded- so intensely connected to you and couldn't wait to feel like you were mine and to bring you home and stare at you for hours on end. And when after five days I was told that I could bring you home, I vowed to be there you, to help you through your days and nights, to help you when you didn't feel well, to comfort you when you were unsure and scared, to make you feel safe and secure as you began to discover the world around you. To show you happiness and bringhten your mood when you were sad. You are so big now. You are able do so many things on your own and have developed into a caring and lovable little one year old boy. I am so lucky to have you as my son and feel so blessed for the way you have touched and changed the lives of your Daddy and brother and sister. While I am sure I will pine for the days when you were so little and melted into my arms, I also welcome the independence you will achieve during the next year and every year after that. Matthew, as you grow and change, please know that we will always be here for you. We love you very much and wish you a very very Happy 1st Birthday, buddy. And in the words of Michael and Claire, Happy Birthday to You! Cha cha cha!

P.S. I know that we worked on blowing the candle out and I know that you were able to do it at home for Mommy. Don't be embarrassed that you couldn't do it at your first birthday. We'll just keep practicing for your 2nd birthday!

Michael's Arm Injury

When my kids get hurt, I swear it hurts me twice as bad as them. I feel bad that I can't help them feel better and sometimes feel guilty that I didn't catch them before they fell or told them that standing on a wobbly board wasn't a good idea. As a parent, I work hard to keep my kids safe but sometimes- no matter how hard I try, they get hurt.

We had had a busy week full of commitments for school while being in the midst of construction and birthday planning. I was so relieved when one of Michael's friends asked him over for a play date. That meant one less carpool pick up time and a more unstructured day. Play dates are very common in Michael's Kindergarten class. We have kids over all the time and Michael is invited to houses frequently, too. I picked up Michael at his friends house late in the afternoon. They were having a ball and playing a tennis game on his friend's Nintendo Wii game station. I chatted with the Mom for a long time as she is a good friend of mine but had difficulty prying Michael away from the game to go home. After about a half hour of Michael ignoring my attempts to leave, the Mom went over and turned off the game. Naturally, both of the boys were mad, but they quickly recovered and we said goodbye.

When I picked Michael up the following afternoon from school, he complained to me about arm pain. "Did you fall at school?" "Did you do anything weird to your arm during P.E. or recess?" "Did you sleep on it weird?" Michael answered no to all of these questions but was really complaining of pain. I grabbed one of Matthew's blankets and then made a sling out of it to give his poor little arm a rest. I was bothered by the mysterious nature of this injury. Of course the fact that I couldn't figure out what was wrong with his arm brought out the inner freak in me. My mind started thinking of these horrible things that could be wrong with him. Maybe there was something wrong with the bone or maybe this was the first sign to a horrible disease. As Moms, we all possess the ability to go to the Crazy Place. Sometimes the sleep deprivation/stress just gets to me and it is hard to shake the horrible thoughts that go through my mind. Whatever the case, I needed to clear my head. I made the kids lunch, put Matthew down for a nap and then grabbed my twice reheated cup of coffee and sat on the couch. What could be wrong with Michael's arm? I went over all he had done that week. All the activities, all the possible times he could've fallen or done something weird.

And then it donned on me. I knew how he had hurt his arm. The thoughts of bone disease and fractures flew out the window and I began to laugh. Michael had hurt his arm playing the Nintendo Wii. That afternoon at this friend's house was the first time he had played this kind of virtual video game. I remembered watching him playing the tennis game and saw how he continually flung his arm out to hit the ball with his game controller. The boys probably played that game for an hour. An hour of jarring his elbow out over and over would certainly cause him some pain or at least some serious soreness. Just as I had gotten up to go tell Damien the funny news, Michael walked in wearing his lavender sling. I tried not to bust up laughing but failed. I then proceeded to tell him why he was hurt. Michael saw the humor in it but he still wanted me to know how much pain he was in. He was also worried that I was going to tell him that he couldn't play that video game anymore. I told him that he could play as long as when his arm started to hurt, he would stop. He agreed but I knew he wasn't telling the truth. Michael has been known to play video games even when his bladder is about to burst or up to the point where he is about to die of thirst. It usually takes me or Damien to say, "Michael- do you need to go to the bathroom or are you just dancing in front of the TV?" Often times when he finishes playing his face is bright red and I know that he needs some water. He doesn't stop to take care of himself on the off chance he might miss something with the game- despite the fact that you can pause most games. Michael and I went to tell Damien the diagnosis of his injury. He thought it was hysterical and we all enjoyed a good laugh over the silliness, yet seriousness nature (according to Michael) of the arm injury.

Over the years, I have heard about and seen a great number of injuries with my children. But I must confess that this was the first injury that I have ever heard of that was caused by a video game. So you are now forewarned of the 'serious' injury that can result from playing a game on the Nintendo Wii. Make sure you stretch before you play and have an ice pack on hand to help you with the soreness.

Damien and the Demo

After watching my parents go through an extensive remodel, you might think that I would've known what I was getting myself into. See, when we bought our new house, we knew that we would have to re-do some of the rooms. For instance, the family room (which was permitted in the 60s and converted from an outdoor patio into a room) was lined with gorgeous wood paneling and complimented with a flagstone floor. Damien and I both saw the potential for something amazing in the large space it occupied when we bought the house, but knew that we would have to act fast because a rock floor with two crazy kids and a crawling infant spelled serious trouble (i.e. concussion, stitches).

Speaking of crazy- we are. We moved into our house on December 30th and then 5 days later, we had our contractors break ground on our half bath. Our half bath doubled as the laundry room and really didn't make sense spatially. It was so funky! Let's just say that if our full bathroom was being used- the kids would not use the half bathroom. It was just that bad. Anyway- moving on . . . We knew what we wanted to do with that space, too. We found this great construction company called Andiamo and we knew they were right for the job. They had great ideas for us and we felt like they would do a great job. Originally they were just going to turn the half bath into a full, but then Damien and I decided that while they were here (wink wink) we might as well just have the family room redone. The only problem? It all had to be done before Matthew's 1st Birthday party which was slated to be held at our house on January 26th. But really, don't parties force you to get your life together in some silly little way?

It was wild to see the transformation take place. In an effort to reduce cost, get the job done on time, as well as be a part of the whole remodel- Damien helped to do some of the demo in the family room. First came down the wood paneling. Layer by layer, the room started to look better. After the paneling came off, he started pulling down the sheet rock. Realizing that he had quite a bit of work ahead of him, he asked his brother Ryan to come and help him one night. They put in the insulation, and then started screwing in the sheet rock. Sure, Damien could've paid someone to do all of that, but I think that when you do something yourself you not only learn something new- but you feel like a real part of the process. As this room will be utilized a great deal in the future, I know that I will think back to the days when Damien toiled to get this room together! It was a lot of work, but I know that in the end, it will have all been worth it. And it was refreshing to see Damien away from his computer work and instead, working with his hands and demo gear! The kids loved this, too!

Heather's 30th Birthday

It is so strange to realize that we are all getting older. Life is constantly moving us forward and it is our job to stop every once in a while and evaluate things. Turning thirty is a great milestone for self evaluation- in my opinion. For me, thirty signified something I couldn't even touch in my twenties. It stood for maturity, confidence, self awareness, and being able to say, I am very happy where I am in my life. I am sure turning thirty means different things to different people, but there is no doubt that it launches you forward, whether you're ready or not, into a different place.

Heather has been anticipating her thirtieth for a while now. She knew that she wanted change to happen in her thirties and almost couldn't wait for it to get here. Months before her birthday I heard someone ask her how old she was and she said she was thirty. I immediately shot her a look and said, "Heather- do not say you are thirty until you are thirty! You are only in your twenties for a few more weeks. Live in the moment, thirty will come!" And come it did.

We all gathered on Heather's actual birthday at a fabulous restaurant in San Francisco called Julius' Castle. The theme for the party was Queen for a Day and Heather had every intention on being pampered and treated like royalty. I had never been to this restaurant and couldn't believe how many steep and windy roads we had to traverse in order to find this quaint little castle sitting on a bluff in the city. When we got out of our cars, we couldn't ignore the sweet sound of what seemed like a hundred birds chirping. I took the kids over to where the sound was coming from only to see about a hundred wild parrots singing their tune in berry bushes. It was unbelievable to see the vibrant green and red birds flying free, without worry. Matthew was especially interested in the sight and Michael and Claire were totally speechless. It was a very neat way to start the afternoon.

We hiked our way up the stairs to the party room which had been given the royal treatment. Marlene knew exactly what Heather would want and I know that Heather wasn't disappointed in the least! Even more breathtaking than the room was the view from the terrace. If you stood in one direction, the Bay Bridge was beautifully displayed behind you. If you stood in the other direction, you could see Alcatraz and all the San Francisco waterfront has to offer. Leave it to Marlene to find a castle in the city!

Family and friends warmly embraced Heather on her special day and you could tell she was so touched. People toasted Heather, Grandma read a very moving tribute to her, Heavenly danced around the room in her Irish Dancing costume (it wouldn't be a real Swendsen party without Heavenly in her Irish getup- Love you Hev!), all the kids helped her blow out her candles, and the cousins ran amok as the adults enjoyed the delicious food and enjoyed each others company. In all seriousness, Heather truly entered a new place that afternoon. Witnessed by all her family, we saw a side of Heather that was new, poised, that promised much and made us all feel happy for Heather that bigger and better things awaited her in this new decade. Happy 30th Birthday Heather.

ig Latin Pay

We have been out smarted. Damien and my secret communication has been detected- in all forms I might add. To be totally honest, I am not sure where to go from here. I feel socially suppressed. Utterly dumbfounded. Where do we go from here?

When the kids were small, Damien and I could talk about anything without them knowing what we were talking about. They were just learning to talk themselves so all we had to do was use bigger words than they knew at the time. If that didn't work, we would describe the words we were talking about. For instance, "Damien do you want to take the kids to the place down the street with the swings?" If we didn't say the word park then they just didn't get it. It was so easy back then! Once their language had developed, we started speaking in Pig Latin. I thought it was a language that was guaranteed to stump them for years! I can remember my parents using Pig Latin and me being so frustrated that I couldn't understand them. So when Michael cracked Pig Latin at age 4, I couldn't believe it. I remember saying to Damien in the car, "When we get home let's give the kids an ap nay." Then Michael said, but I don't want to take a nap! This decoding prompted us to speak full sentences in Pig Latin so that it would be harder for them to decipher. My plan backfired as I think hearing by the Pig Latin so frequently, it just helped Michael and Claire understand it and its principals better. I think it is safe to say that another secret language has bit the dust.

Desperate to communicate in front of the kids without being discovered, we started spelling our words. We started spelling out a word or two until they figured that out. However, we didn't really change things; we just started spelling words faster. This even stumped a few friends and family who had difficulty themselves understanding what we had just spelled. As the kids are now reading and writing, our success rate at spelling without being understood is at 50%. I happily take these odds as I don't see Damien nor I finding time to learn a foreign language anytime soon.

The whole point of this is that our kids are growing up- getting older. I laugh when I think back to the crazy baby days with Michael and Claire when they were so unaware of their surroundings. Now I have children who not only understand my pathetic attempts at secretly communicating, but who also are able to fully communicate with me through both speech and writing. Just yesterday when I went into my room, Claire had left a note on my bed that said, "Mom, I do not want to play anymore." She had written it herself with no help from me. Claire was expressing her displeasure with me telling her that if she cheats while playing a game, then I wasn't going to play anymore. And so it begins.

Language connects us all. We use it to express happiness, to communicate sadness, to inform, and to invite. Yet while we all find communication to be a necessary part of our everyday lives, we must at the same time also understand the power behind our words. This has been a learning process for my children as they are learning that you can't just say things that you don't mean. For instance, I have heard once or twice when the kids were mad at me, "I wish you weren't my Mom." Sure they are just angry and trying to get under my skin. But I would be lying if I said that it didn't hurt to hear them say that- even with the knowledge that they don't really mean it. Sometimes in life we only get one chance to say something to someone. We have a choice when it comes to communicating. We choose how and what to say and sometimes things just don't come out the way we had planned. It is times like these that we need to slow down and think about how we sound to others. As I am teaching my children these necessary principals, I too, am reminded to slow down and think. God gave us our voice and we all want to be heard. As I have said a million times to my children, "Use Your Words". The power behind them can move mountains. Which leads me to the question, What will you move today?

Happy Birthday Damien!

Due to the fact that Damien's birthday is on New Year's Eve, he seems to get the short end of the stick sometimes. This is not to say that the effort to celebrate him is not 100%- it is just that having a birthday party surrounded by all of your family and friends can prove to be difficult. People want to go to New Year's Eve parties. They like to go away for the weekend and take advantage of the long weekend. This is all understandable and Damien certainly gets it.

As if having your birthday on New Year's Eve isn't enough distraction- this year, Damien's birthday was the weekend of our big move! Since people were going to be coming to our neck of the woods to help us move, I figured it would be a great time to have a family/friend birthday party for him. We moved the day before his actual birthday and most of our close family and friends were here to help us out (which we appreciate more than they know and will never forget their amazing efforts!). We moved from about 10:00 am until 5:15 p.m. and then headed over to a great restaurant in downtown Willow Glen. I am so thankful that we decided to have the dinner at a local restaurant as the move took a bit longer than we had originally thought. Dinner reservations were at 5:30 p.m. and we, or should I say the guys took the last box out of the UHaul at 5:15 p.m. We all made it to dinner for a much needed respite from the move but also happy to finally be celebrating Damien!

Dinner was great. I say this a million times on my blog, but it feels so wonderful to be surrounded by family and friends. To look around the table and see all those people who love and care for Damien was kind of emotional. It is moments like these where you see true love and dedication to friendship. We had a delicious dinner and toasted to Damien while also thanking everyone for their efforts earlier in the day. That night we had our first house guests as Marlene, Sierrah, and Alexander spent the night in our new home! It was really fun because all the cousins had a giant sleepover in the living room. They don't get to see their cousins from Oregon that often, but it was so nice to see all of them hang out together and bond.

The following morning, Damien's actual birthday, he had to work a little bit. Being that the Internet was not yet connected at our new house- he had to go into the office and then occasionally go to the Starbucks across the street to check his email. Once he had finished work in the morning, we opened gifts and then headed to a great little local breakfast place. Since Sierrah's birthday was only 4 days later, we also celebrated with her and toasted the two birthday kids at breakfast. Afterwards, much to Michael and Claire's dismay, Marlene and their cousins went back north. Once the kids got over their sadness, we realized that it was the first time our little family was alone in our new house. Boxes everywhere, messes left and right- but our house felt like our home. We relaxed for the majority of the day and then had dinner at home with Heather that night. We had cake, party poppers and celebrated the New Year early so we could put our exhausted kids to bed. The funny thing was that we didn't have our television moved over here yet. I can't remember the last time we rung in the New Year without watching the ball drop. Knowing this was the case, Damien and I got all the kids down and then just sat and talked for a few hours in our new living room. We reflected on the last year and all the changes (new baby, new school, new house) and felt blessed to be where we are in our lives. Having Damien's birthday in our new house was a great way to kick off our new life here. We hope there are many new beginnings, many celebrations, and many wonderful memories made within the walls of our new home. It was a great year for Damien and we look forward to reflecting next year on what another 365 days will bring.

11 Months Already?

So, here I am again writing a monthly update for Matthew. In the beginning, it felt as if it took forever for a month to pass to write an update. Yet as Matthew gets bigger and more independent, I feel that time is just slipping by! 11 months. WOW! One little month until I don't categorize his age by months. He'll be one year old. That makes me crazy! This little guy who has taken over our hearts is growing like a weed and learning so many new things each and every day.

December is a busy month in of itself. Matthew's month was really dictated by the holiday celebrations and holiday travel. On the road, meeting new people, having new experiences is what propelled Matthew to have a big month with mobility and a jump in his personality. Matthew has turned into a babbling machine. Da da da, ma ma ma, do do do, duh duh duh, ohhhhhh, and num num num are some of the more common sounds to come out of his mouth. The exciting news of the month is that Matthew has said his first word! Anyone that knows me or has spent time around me knows that I call food 'num nums'. I will ask Matthew, "Do you want some more num nums?" and he knows what I am talking about. So when we were up at my parent's house, this num num business (coupled with the fact that Matthew is an eating- or should I say num num machine) caught on. He started seeing food and saying num num. He would say this over and over until we gave him the food which I think is awesome!! This month he also started calling me na na. These are just small reminders that this quiet little guy is waking up in the vocalization department and now were are going to start hearing what is on his mind!

Some physical changes this month is that he got his first haircut this month (as I mentioned in a previous blog). He is also continuing to grow thicker and chubbier. When we took him into the doctor when he had a double ear infection he weighed in at 25lbs. 2 oz. I am going to start weaning him from breastfeeding this month and I really hope he has no trouble switching to cow's milk. (Something tells me this won't be a problem!) For some reason Matthew's hands have been looking bigger to me. On the contrary, his cute little feet continue to be on the skinny side. It is so cute to look at the rolls melting off his legs next to his sweet little ankles and feet! Matthew has been showing a preference to his left hand. The only person in our family that is a lefty is Damien and he is truly hoping to have that in common with his little guy.

We have been patiently waiting for Matthew to become mobile. There was certainly no pressure as I have my hands full keeping after the three kids as it was! But much to our delight, Matthew is moving and moving quickly. Around mid December, he finally started crawling. Within a few weeks he was crawling quickly, crawling up and down a few stairs, and pulling himself up to a stand on anything he could get his hands on. Can you say danger? He is actually pretty cautious, but the minute you go ahead and trust him to stand on his own, he falls and hurts himself. So we are in full blown 'Matthew Watch' but enjoying seeing him navigate around the house!

No teeth this month, but lots of drool (par for the course). He still has 4 teeth and I don't see anymore that are trying to work their way in. Because he is finally rid of the teething discomfort, he is pretty much always in a happy mood. His personality is shining through and we love it! He totally knows when something is funny and even laughs at it even if no one else does. He loves being held by me or Damien and chasing the other two kiddos around the house. He laughs and laughs and thinks they are the coolest. Michael and Claire seem to have grown to appreciate Matthew in a different way. Instead of thinking Matthew is so cute; they tend to see him as a pal, someone who can really take part in their lives. As a mother, this is so rewarding. One thing that has changed is that now that Matthew is mobile, he has started getting into their stuff. Michael is really into legos. He will spend hours building and setting them up only for 'Matthew the Destroyer' to come and ruin it in one fell swoop. Claire has also been upset because she sets these little Disney Princess figurines up so methodically on her vanity. Each and every little figure has its place and Matthew comes in and in less than five seconds, they have been flung onto the floor. While they do get upset, Michael and Claire have grown to be more tolerant of their little brother.


So that is pretty much how Matthew is doing now that he is 11 months. While he is continuing to grow and change, so has his environment. This month we moved into a new house and he is now sharing a room with his big brother. The verdict on that- so far so good. Also packed into this month, Matthew loved celebrating his first ever Christmas. All in all, it was a busy yet memorable month for our big guy. Having two older kids reminds me daily to enjoy Matthew in all of his little splendor. This phase, while exhausting at times, doesn't last long and I want to look back on his babyhood and know I cherished each and everything I could.

Matthew, you continue to make me laugh, you make me giggle when I hear you breathing out of your mouth when you concentrate, you amaze me with the amount of Gerber snacks you can shove into your tiny mouth without choking, you make me feel so blessed when I see your sweet face when you sleep, and you make my heart skip a beat when I see the way you capture the hearts of your brother and sister. You have graced us all with your presence and I thank you for being such a wonderful son. It has almost been one year! I cannot believe it when I think back to the day I first saw your sweet chubby face. I love you buddy and thank you for all you have given to me over the past 11 months. As I start planning your first birthday, a twinge of sadness comes over me. But when I think of all the happiness and fullness your first year brought to me, that sadness drifts away and I am left with the vision of your sweet smile, dimple and all. 11 months Matthew, wow. Thanks buddy. You make all of us so so happy.